My problem with “sucks”
KeithHandy posted in Your Soul on June 9th, 2008
A quick rant to a group of people that aren’t reading this anyway:
When you hang out with a group of people, physically or virtually, and you finally realize what it is about the group that bothers you, good luck expressing or resolving it. Maybe it was impossible to understand from your perspective, but I’m completely serious when I say I can’t carry on a conversation with people that use the word “sucks” as often as you. It’s not a language issue, it’s a “way of looking at life” issue. If you’re sitting in a studio, trying to record a guitar part, and you botch up take 7 and say “that sucked”, that’s fine. But if you swing the word “sucks” around like a machine gun to wipe out entire songs, albums, and artists who actually put some effort into their work, without you putting any effort into explaining why, or even having the humility to acknowledge that your opinion is subjective, it only makes your armchair righteousness look all the more pathetic.
In short, if you haven’t tried to cut your own, then none of us give a shit what you think of ours. People who have tried, appreciate what other artists do even at their low points — not in blind worship, but out of respect for the guts it takes to keep going when you’re not sure where you’re going. (Maybe this doesn’t occur to you from the comfort of your computer chair, but there are no blueprints for this stuff, people; anybody who does know where they’re going, isn’t being creative.)
Some of you have very openly admitted (boasted?) that you have no desire to leave any mark on the world beyond the butt-shaped indentation on your couch, because you’re “not going to be here after you die anyway”. The same lot of you is struggling with depression. Have you considered that maybe if you did care about your impact in the world, your time on this planet might be more fulfilling, and, oh, I don’t know, happier?
Here is what I will concede. You and I are in a room. A song is playing. I don’t like the song. You do like the song. Instead of me saying, “you are wrong, the song sucks, you should learn to hate it”, I will admit that I am the one who isn’t appreciating it, and that your experience is genuine, and it’s too bad I’m not “there” with you. I can tell you how I’m perceiving the song, what I associate it with, what bugs, irritates, drives me nuts about it, and what I would do differently if it were my song — but I have no right to imply that you should be ashamed to like it. I will instead acknowledge that the song clashes with the way I see and hear life, I have a weak connection with or relationship to it, and it isn’t a good fit for the wavelength I’m on. (In general, I find that experienced musicians are more likely than naïve musicians or non-musicians to treat other people’s opinions with this kind of respect.)
Here is how 99% of the internet apparently understands subjectivity:
- Your opinion is subjective.
- My opinion is objective.
We could go so much farther as a global community of music and art appreciators if more of us had the motivation to grow past that mindset… and by “so much farther”, I mean not stuck in this one stupid pile of mud day in and day out.
Those of you who get what I’m saying, no need to pass the rant itself around; just try to set a good example. Maybe it will rub off on a few people here and there.
